ABV = alcohol by volume. Arggh!…Another damn Gopher!

Watching the Stanley Cup playoff game number 2 with my visiting Brother-in-Law, eldest son, youngest son, and this bartender that says she writes. She said she wants to write about beer…and that she knows a thing or two about the hops. We’ll see ’bout that…if she chimes in. I last wrote about this joint and told you I saw Willie Nelson. Well I did…today is another day. I also told you I would probably be back…well I am!

A very interesting afternoon that ended with 10% ABV beer. Holly cow…I’m slamed! A day trip in the Thing to the coast and back again ending in another visit to the local hideouts.

Prohibition Brewery STILL has not changed their menu. My Bro-in-Law pointed out that the menus being used still says “Soft Opening” along the top…something I hadn’t noticed before. Seriously, you need to do something about the menu. All of my rants have fallen upon deaf ears. Now, if I ever see the owner again, I have something to complain about…legitimately. There’s other issues I’ll probably discuss in another segment. Change…or sell…Hmmm, maybe me? I really need to stop thinking!

After dropping off the groceries at the house I drug his butt “across the street” to the Gopher Hole. I had spoken with several of the staff as my son kept the 10% ABV thinning my blood. The one bartender gal seemed to speak quite well of several of the beers that were available. Somehow, I kept getting the same beer every time. Damn kids! Then another bartender showed up in some kind of Martian-galactic-eclipse-of-Pluto-atire on. Hot pink top and giant poke-a-dots shorts. I could have used her as a road flare! Well, I finally swindled my way into the kitchen that revealed a very capable arrangement that is being used to fuel the crap menu of typical bar food. I would like to say that it’s good…but it sucks. The menu…that is. We ordered some criss or cross-cut fries that were just ordinary. At least the ranch dressing held up to the drip test. I guess if you’re serving standard bar food to a bunch of gophers…I mean golfers, then it’s adequate. I get more frustrated knowing there is so much opportunity just around my house and everyone serves shit for food.

Anyway, the staff, that I finally got to talk to, had made my afternoon while watching the Kings take the series 2-0. Whatever, another sport I only watch if they’re winning. I guess I’m ready for Charger football. The staff at The Gopher Hole was cool. They talked with me about the business and having to cope with several owners making the same basic F&B blunders over and over again. People buying the business that have no idea what they’re doing, and providing the same crap when they could be a standout, with simplistic variations and alterations to their menu that could potentially set them apart. But, there remains no competition in the area, and therefore no reason to compete. But, enough local area draw could make the difference, with minimal expenditures on the ingredients and cooking techniques, this place could rock. This one gopher,… I mean golfer kept coming in to inquire about the hot dog she ordered. “Where’s my hot dog?” Hmmm, I’m getting a little worried here. I’m sure it’s just a regular hot dog, yet why was she so concerned? “Where’s my hot dog?” I’m beginning to wonder why the damn dog was so important. Just why…or what, is so important to her about this hot dog? Is the dog a special kind of dog? Is the bun, a special kind of bun?… NO! Just a standard dog. Why can’t that dog be some kind religious retreat? Grill it. Serve it with green onions. Top it with grilled sauerkraut or grilled onions and some kick-ass mustard. How about offering her the ol’ Italian sauseech (sorry, had to do it) on a grilled french roll. Top it with Chimichurri. And you can probably get another $1 out her…and you know it’s gonna have that patron stop for a moment longer and realize they should order a beer. Now that’s where you’re really going to cash in. And you know it’ll stand out, and that golfer will be back to the Gopher again…’cause they don’t know how to make the Chimi, or why it was so good. Really? How much did that change cost? Change, damn it! Maybe then I’ll finally stop complaining. I live out in the middle of gopher infested land and I’m surrounded by golf course establishments that serve crap…pisses me off. There’s so much potential. I see the ownerships change several times since living here…but no body gets it. My brother says Castle Creek Inn is highly recommended. Why not make the restaurant the same? Maybe I’ll have to be next.

The Gopher Hole – at least I think we now have a decent bar nearby. At least the staff made it worth another visit…for another 10% ABV. So like I have said before…and Arnold say’s in his movies, “I’ll be back!”


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